No warnings, unless you count Tara accidentally typing the f-slur instead of “fangz,” and I don’t.
Recap: Voldemort showed up while Ebony was eating breakfast in the Great Hall with her friends and again demanded that she kill Vampire. Immediately after he left, Ebony had another vision of Voldemort coming to kill Draco and decided she’d better ask “Professor Sinister” about the visions.
AN: prepz stup flaming da story ur jus jelous so fuk u ok go 2 hel!11 raven fagz 4 di help!
No idea what Tara thinks the prepz have to be jealous of. Also not going to comment on the unfortunate typo.
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Well we had Deviation next so I got to ask Proffessor Trevolry about the visions.
She means Divination. Professor Trevolry, who is the same person as Professor Sinister, is Tara’s take on Professor Trelawney — if you aren’t familiar with canon, Trelawney teaches Divination and generally comes off as a complete hack but does occasionally have genuine visions. Now that you know, you can completely forget about all of that, because Tara sure did.
“Konnichiwa everybody come in.” said Proffesor Sinister in Japanese.
Did she say the whole thing in Japanese, or just “Konnichiwa,” which is already Japanese?
She smelled at me with her gothic black lipstick.
Sure.
She’s da coolest fucking teacher ever. She had long dead black hair with blood red tips and red eyes. (hr mom woz a vampire. She’s also haf Japanese so she speaks it and everyfing. she n b’loody mry get along grate) She’s really young for a teacher. 2day she was wearing a black leather top with red lace and a long goffik black ripped dress.
So… yeah, that’s who Professor Trevolry/Sinister is. Not a major character, but an important one going forward; she’s our resident cool professor. It’s through her that this fanfic’s actual plot (yes, there is an actual plotline, and we’re getting quite close to it, only twenty-four chapters in!) is revealed. She also has a mini character arc of her own that makes absolutely fuck-all sense, so look forward to that too.
We went inside the black classroom with pastors of Emily the Strong.
…sure.
I raced my hand.
Who won?
I was wearing some black naie Polish with red pentagrams on it.
“What is it Ebony?” she asked. “Hey I love ur nail polish where’d u get it, Hot Topik?”
“Yeah.” I answered. All the preps who didn’t know what HT was gave me weird looks.
Harry Potter canon more or less states that the average wizard has a poor understanding of Muggle culture and may even struggle with Muggle clothing, so I’d wager that’s the reason other students are confused. Also I’ve no idea if they even have Hot Topic in the UK, so that too.
Then again, who am I kidding? Tara doesn’t care about any of that stuff.
I gave them the middle finger.
That’s my girl!
“Well I have to talk to you about some fings. When do you want to due it?”
Ebony, if you’re looking to talk privately with a professor, you know you can approach them before or after class? Especially if it seems you’re pretty friendly with said professor? Double especially if you live in the same building, since I’m pretty sure Hogwarts professors also live on campus during the academic year?
“Ho about now?” she asked.
“OK.” I said.
“OK class fucking dismissed every1.” Proffesor Trevolry said and she let every1 go.
Well, that’s one way to handle it, I guess. Scratch what I said earlier. Also I remember particularly enjoying the Trevolry scenes the first time I read this fanfic and I suppose this is why — she really doesn’t give a single fuck.
“Except for you Britney.” she pointed at Britney and sum other preps. “Please do exorcize (geddit) 1 on page 3.”
Oh my god, fantastic. Fantastic.
Just as a side note, I’ve been rereading the Harry Potter books because I’m currently listening to a podcast where the hosts do the same (The Shrieking Shack — look it up, I recommend it), and I forgot how Dahl-esque the humor in the early books is. Frequently the jokes hinge on characters being really nasty in a way that’s played for lighthearted comedy. What I’m trying to say is that this joke about assigning preps extra homework for no reason totally works in-universe, and I’d even count it as a point towards Tara having read the books.
“OK I’m having lotz of visions.” I said in a worried voice. I’m so worried is Draco gong 2 die.
Well she gave me a black cryptal ball to lock in. I looked at it.
“What do you c?” she asked.
“I said I see a black gothic skull and a pentagram.”
Trevolry slapped her forehead in dismay. “Crap, I forgot that’s the goth crystal ball. It doesn’t tell the future or anything, it just shows you goth stuff. Disregard that.”
Suddenly there was a knock at the door. I looked at it. It was Draco. He was looking really sexy wearing a black leather facet, a black gothic Linkin Park t-shirt and blak Congress shoes.
A black leather what? Congress shoes? Does he have pants on or nah?
“Okay you can go now, see ya cunt.” said Proffesor Sinister.
“Bye bitch.” I said waving.
Holy fuck. Now that’s how teachers and students should interact!
I went to Draco and Vampire was sitting next to him. We both followed Draco together and I was so exhibited.
I’m just not gonna ask.