There’s another sex scene this chapter.
Recap: Ebony met seventeen-year-old Voldemort, who in this version is a goth boy who goes by Satan (because of course) and attended Hogwarts in the 80s (because this is Tara and she doesn’t care). They talked a bit and it seemed to be going okay, but then Ebony was abruptly taken back to the future (geddit) and encountered Trevolry dealing with the effects of Voldemortserum addiction… whatever those effects are. Look, I don’t know anymore.
N: I sed shut up itz nut my folt ok if u don’t lik da story den ur a prep so fuk u flamerz!1111 ps im nut updating ubtil u giv me fiv god reviewz nd diz tim I men it!111111 U SUK!1111 fangz raven 4 di help il promiz to help u wif ur story lolz1
Oh, I don’t recall if I mentioned this, but Raven did have her own FF.net account (as Tara mentioned way back in chapter one) and there was a fic posted there that was similar to this one, minus any of the interesting elements. More “goths at Hogwarts” stuff but without the insanity this fic has. If Tara had given Raven a hand with it, I think it would have actually improved things.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX666XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
“Oh my fuking god!1” I shooted sadly. “Shud we get u 2 St Manga’s, bitch?”
“Hel no!” she said. “Lizzen Egogy, I need ur help. Nex tim u go bak in tim, do u fink u kod ask Tom Andorson 4 sum help?”
Tom Andorson? Tara, hi, is everything alright over there?
Anyway, asking seventeen-year-old Voldemort for help sounds like a fantastic idea, I’m sure there’s no one else suited to help with this problem. (Unless Tara, who seems to think Veritaserum is actually called “Voldemortserum” as that’s how she keeps referring to it, thinks it’s somehow a creation of his? Betting this won’t be addressed either.)
“Sure I said sadly. I went outside the door. Draco was there!111 He wuz wearing a big blak GC tshit which wuz his panamas.
Wait. Just a t-shirt? I get it’s oversized but… still.
“Hey Sexxy.” I said.
“How’d it go Enoby?” he asked in his voice was so sexy and low kinda like Gerard Way when hes talking.
I wouldn’t describe Gerard Way as having a low speaking voice, but, otherwise, sure.
“Fine.” I reponded. We stared 2 go bak in2 da dorm.
“How far did u go wif Satan?” Drako asked jealously.
“Not 2 far, lol.” I borked.
I don’t know why she isn’t just leveling with him that nothing happened.
“Will you hav to do it with him?” Draco asked angstily.
“I hop not 2 far!111” I shouted angrily. Den I felt bad 4 shooting at him. I said sorry. We frenched.
“What happened 2 Snipe?” I growled.
“U will see.” Draco giggled mistressly.
I love this typo. Don’t really have anything else to say except that the mental image this invoked was delightful.
He opened a door……………Snap nd Lumpkin werz there!11 Serious waz pokering dem by staging dem wif a blak nife.
It’s no St. Mango’s, but it’ll have to do.
“NOOOO PLZ!1111” Lumpkin bagged as Serious started 2 suk his blood. I laffed statistically. I tok some photons of him and Snap bing torqued. (ok I no dis iz men but fink abot it ppl dey r pedoz nd Snap trid 2 rap dem and neway sadiztz rok haz any1 seen shrak atak 3 lolz).
Tara, you don’t have to justify it so hard to us. We already knew Ebony was acting statistically.
We took sum of Snipe’s blod den Drako and I went bak 2 our roomz. We sat on my goffik blak coffin. My cloves were kinda drity so I pot on a blak leather outfit fingie kinda like da 1 Suelene haz in Undreworld. (if u haven’t herd of it den FUK U!111) .
I hate to admit it, but this one I actually don’t know off the top of my head. Guess I’m a prep now. Sorry, guys, we had a good run.
I put on some blak platform high heelz. Darko put on ‘desolition liverz’ by MCR.
Typos aside, “Demolition Lovers” is (if you ask me) the best track off MCR’s first album. I’d encourage you to give it a listen if you haven’t already but like their Danger Days stuff, since it’s thematically similar.
Den………………………………………….we storted 2 take of eachotherz clozez.
So what the hell was the point of getting changed, then??
I tok of his shit nd he had a six-pak, lolz. We started 2 mak out lik in Da Grudge. He pot his wetnes in my u-know-what sexily. I gut an orgy.
I may have lied earlier when I said all the sex scenes in this story are IKEA erotica. We’ve moved beyond that into entirely new territory. Also… his wetness, huh? Tara keeps unintentionally implying the main three are trans and I kinda love it. Rights.
“Oh Draco!111111!1 Oh mi fuking gud Draco!1111” I screemed passively as he got an eructation.
Hm. I’ve got questions about this sequence of events but I won’t get into it.
“I luv u TaEbory.” he whispred sexily and den we fel aspleep lol.
Oh, Tara.