We’ve reached the end, folks. I’d like to congratulate everyone who’s made it this far, and also to apologize for this fic’s existence on behalf of its remarkably unapologetic author.
Warning for suicide and discussion of self-harm in this chapter.
Recap: Red and Purple fought following the news of Sek’s pregnancy, and Red ended up leaving Purple for Sek. After she gave birth, to a baby boy named Cyle, Red and Purple finally reconciled.
A/N: *sigh*
Noooo! The sighing’s infected the author, too! Soon we’ll catch it! RUN!
I’ve spent most of the day reading ArmandLeg’s and Mouko’s stories… and I suddenly feel so small. Those are great works of art that I can’t seem to measure up to.
I don’t know a thing about either of these (presumably fanfic) writers, and I’m not sure I want to if this author likes them. And, while there are certain fanfic authors I look up to as authors, I’m not sure I’d exactly consider their stories “great works of art.” That’s a term I generally reserve for, you know, actually great works of art.
*bigger sigh*
FOR GOD’S SAKE, RUN! IT MUST BE CONTAGIOUS!
So here’s the ending of Love Knows No Race.
Well, finally. What took you so long?
Sek stormed down the halls of the Massive, her new baby in her arms.
On the bright side, at least she isn’t sighing.
Yet.
She had waited for Red to return for the last 3 days that she was in the hospital wing. She was positive that he would come back to help her raise their new baby, Cyle.
You don’t need to tell us the kid’s name again. We got it the first time.
And isn’t that rather naïve of you, Sek? You really thought he’d come back? Really?
It was impossible that someone as smart as Red would leave someone as beautiful as her.
Sek has never been described as beautiful — or even attractive — before. We’re on the last chapter. Such description seems rather belated.
Also, there’s the whole thing where she’s his evil rapist grandchild, but that’s just nitpicking.
“I’m gonna kill him… That’s all I need to do. I can raise the child, while being the Tallest.” She smiled to herself. She thought that Purple had already killed himself from knowing that Red would never come back to him… ever.
And she never bothered to check on that?
She hoped that Red threw himself out an airlock at the news, so she didn’t have to get dirty.
As she walked back to the room that she and Red once shared, she searched her mind for possible ways to kill the bastard. Disemboweling and dismemberment seemed too good for him.
So Sek doesn’t want to “get dirty,” but she’s considering disemboweling and dismemberment as murder methods. Makes sense.
She didn’t have the power to shatter his heart anymore… what the hell was she going to do?
As she placed the new baby Irken in it’s new crib and tucked it in, she reached for her favorite sharp object.
Mashy spike plate?
It was a human kitchen item, a cheese grater. Zim had told her stories of the hideous lice outbreak, and how the had to take a skin sample with an electronic cheese grater.
This author actually watched the show! I’m surprised.
From that moment on, it had been her favorite torture item. From shredding cheese or chicken, to cutting herself. It was amazing… the scars turned out to be miniature paintings in themselves.
Okay, stop. First of all, author, you don’t need to tell us that you can grate cheese with a cheese grater. Second of all, who grates chicken? Is it just me, or is that really weird? And third of all, I’m not an expert on self-harm, but an electric grater seems like a weird thing to use for that. I’ve grated myself with a cheese grater before on accident; it’s not actually all that painful, at least not at first, since it only really cuts into the top couple layers of skin and not down to the nerve endings. If she likes it because of the scars it produces, okay, but I can’t imagine a cheese grater as leaving interesting scars; you’d have to really cut deep, which is hard to do with a cheese grater, and you’d have way more precision with a knife. Lastly, I don’t think it counts as torture if you’re torturing yourself. Autosadomasochism, maybe, but that’s not exactly torture.
She sighed and shook her head. It was still too good for him.
“What am I going to do?” She asked herself. She could feel that he was still alive somehow.
It’s okay, author, it’s not like you have to actually explain the nonsensical stuff that happens in your story. You can just keep pulling stuff out of your ass. That’s how real writers do it.
And she knew that he would be with Purple if he wasn’t dead. She decided to find out the easy way. She dug her floating communicator out from under her bed and turned it on.
“Red and Purple surveillance mode only, please.” Her command was immediately obeyed as a small camera in their room showed that Red was indeed with Purple.
And she never did this earlier… why?
Purple didn’t kill himself.
No. Really.
“Damn… I hoped he would.”
Me too.
She sighed and turned her communicator off and grabbed a simple gun. This would end two ways. They would die, or she would die.
Can’t there be a third option where everyone dies? I think I would like that best.
She turned to her new baby and almost began to cry.
But didn’t, because even the author realizes that’s weird and OOC.
“And they aren’t getting you…” She said to the precious baby boy. She grabbed him up and walked out the door.
She ran down the empty halls of the Massive… this was where all the families lived. She sighed and hugged her baby tight and left him in a doorway.
“I will miss you with all my heart, Cyle.” She said leaning down and kissing him one last time before knocking on the door and running off.
Now, it’s totally possible to write a character who can be horribly cruel to some and doting and kind to their offspring. (Or, at least, harbor some affection for their children while still being emotionally/physically abusive.) Possible, that is, for someone who can actually write. I see what the author’s trying to do here — or at least what I think she’s trying to do — but she doesn’t have the writing skill to pull it off. Hence, this is just terrible.
She stood in front of the Tallest’s room and sighed. She would be the only one who died tonight, but goddamnit she was going to make a show over it.
What a drama queen.
Why has she suddenly decided to commit suicide in front of the Tallest? Why can’t she stick to her original plan of killing them and taking over? What’s to stop her?
She knocked loudly.
“Red! Open this door!” She commanded. She heard a curse and suddenly Red stood before her.
That’s a curse all right.
“What do you want, Sek?” He asked tiredly. At least he was fully clothed, which she was thankful for.
But I thought she liked seeing him nekkid!
“I’ve come here to kill you and Purple.” She said with a bored look on her face.
And now the author is trying to make Sek “cooler” by making her into a bored, emotionless killer, ignoring the fact that her characterization up till this point has been completely different.
“Really?” He asked.
“Really, dick face.” She said shoving him into the room and shutting the door behind her.
Dick face?
She pulled out her gun and Purple gasped.
I got news for you, gaspin’ boy!
“I’m killing you guys.” She said simply, aiming the gun at Purple. He looked wide eyed at the barrel and dove as she fired her first shot. It grazed his head, causing blood to run madly, causing him to pass out.
Causing the author to overuse the word “causing.”
Red was in shock.
“You killed him!” Red said pointing.
“I did not. I grazed his head. Now, you want an interesting story to tell him when he wakes up?”
“You do? Too bad. I’m gonna tell you a little story called ‘Love Knows No Race’ instead. By the end, you’ll be wishing you were the one who got shot in the head!”
She asked pointing the gun and her own head.
She pointed the gun and her head?
“What do you mean?” Red asked uncertainly.
“Do you want a story to tell him?” She asked again. Red shrugged so she started.
I don’t really think people “shrug” in situations this serious.
“Tell him this: (A/N: I’m stealing this idea from Susan Kay, but it fits so well!)
I’m pretty sure I’ve gone on rants in the past regarding author’s notes in the middle of stories, but this example is really exceptional. This is the most dramatic moment in the entire story, and you’re seriously going to stick your author’s note in the middle of it?
There once was a pure white rose and a dove whiter than snow.
When the dove first saw the rose, he knew that it was love at first sight. But the rose was a closed rose; he wouldn’t dare open his petals to anyone.
This is totally not a metaphor for anything.
The dove went to the rose day after day, confessing his love for the rose, asking of the rose to open his petals.
Nope. No metaphors here. No sir.
But the Rose dared not. For he was warned when created by Allah, “If you open your petals to something not meant to be, you will be punished. And I will be angry, as something will be created that doth not need to see this world.”
Wait. What?
Introducing religion into this story is so weird that I think my mind just melted a little. Is the author Muslim, or is this an actual Islamic story she’s adapting here, or what the hell? Why is this in an Invader Zim fanfic?
So this went on, for many months, and many seasons.
As was implied by “many months.”
Until 3 springs later, the dove came back to the rose.
“Oh Rose!” The dove cried. “Rose, please, I ask of you once more; Open your petals to me! If you do not,” The dove cooed, “I will surly die!”
Well, if that isn’t a great pick-up line I don’t know what is.
“Dove…” The rose replied hesitantly,” Dove, I wish I could… with all my heart… but I cannot. For Allah has forbidden me so… if I do, I will be punished. If I do, Allah will be angry…” The rose said to him.
You already said the rose was talking to the dove. You don’t need to say that twice. Learn to fucking write.
“Rose, does it mean nothing that I love you?” The dove asked.
“Pretty much.”
“It means everything in the world, you know that. But I have made a decision, Dove.” The rose said simply. “Though you must tell no one…” He said quietly.
“I really like using adverbs,” he whispered gleefully.
And just as the dawn came upon them, the Rose burst into full bloom.
Not a metaphor.
“For you my love…” He said. Born from their undying love, was the Blood Red Rose, that Allah had created and that he did not want the human world to see.”
…So then he killed them both?
Sek said, a tear running down her face.
What the hell is wrong with this crazed Irken lady? Why does the author just think you can switch your character’s personality every five minutes?
So far in the fic, Sek has been:
a crazed parent-murderer
a crazed rapist
a loving mother
an emotionless killer
crying over religious stories
Seriously. What the hell is this story?
“Two of the most unlikely of sorts, created a new beauty. Tell him that… for me…
So this is supposed to be a metaphor for Sek and Red having Cyle? Or for Red and Purple having Zim and Dib? Or for Zim and Dib having Sek? Or all three?
Honestly, I don’t even know. But whichever way you look at it, it’s nonsensical.
And tell him, that no matter what happens, Love Knows No Race.” She said shedding one last tear, and pulling the trigger.
Title drop!
I’m sure I don’t need to point out to you guys that the title hasn’t made sense since chapter 2, or whenever it was that Dib also turned out to be Irken. Since then, every couple in the fic has been Irken, indicating that love does know a race. “Love Doesn’t Care If You’re Related” might be more accurate at this point.
The End
Thank god.
MORAL OF THE STORY: That there are no ends to love, and that you should never judge or force other’s love.
Really? Because I think the moral is “Plan out what’s going to happen in your alien yaoi incest fic before you sit down and write it.” This is seriously the worst piece of writing I have ever read. It’s a goddamn pity that when I first read this fic I was too young to drink away the memory afterwards, but I sure as hell feel like doing that now, if it’s not too late.