I hope you all enjoy this chapter; it’s probably the most action-packed one yet.
Content warnings for this chapter include more (attempted) rape, a consensual sex scene (not described), and some violence. And a hell of a lot of nonsense that may hurt your brain if you think about it too hard.
Recap: Tiaa competed in, and won, a school talent contest. Edward was very impressed with her, but Tiaa was still angry about him rejecting her advances back in chapter 4, so she yelled at him and then went and had a cry.
AN - dnt all just attack me for the things writen in this chapter about Tiaas parents, i havent explaned everything yet an it will make more sense later.
Which probably means it will make no sense now, but we’ll see.
Chapter 6 - the curse
-Oh ewdard with your skin so white
Your eyes like amber out of sight
Pale angel in my eyes
Hair like gold rosy sunrise-
That’s a hell of a poem, but maybe you should stick to prose.
I read the words of my poem out quietly. I had written a poem about Edward, i just couldnt help myself. I hated myself for doing it but i couldnt get him out of my mind and it was the only way i could deal with my feelings.
Soddenly my mind went black and i felt into a trance.
In my original version of the MST I made a comment here about Tiaa needing therapy and antipsychotics. I would have reproduced it as-is, but I don’t wanna seem like I’m making light of mental illness; that being said, as someone who goes to therapy and takes antipsychotics, this girl could use some professional medical attention. Like, pronto.
A tall pale man stood in front of me all ghosty and misty like he was only half there.
It was… VLODEMORT AND DA DETH DEALERS!!11!1
“my daugher? My daughter?” he moaned
“who are you?” i wispa quietly
“i am your FATHER!
That’s a real shocker after he just called her his daughter.
I AM CAIUS FROM THE VOLTURI!
Not positive why he’s screaming this part, but I’ll go with it.
Your in terror and peril my daugher!
God I fucking love this author’s use of the English language.
Beware the vampire boy called edward!"
"why?” I said
“you mussent let him sex you or the curse your mother tried to protect you from will fall on you…you’ll become a VAMPIRE!
Uh… what? Lemme dissect this.
Tiaa’s dad is a vampire. Presumably her mom was not, though I get the feeling mom may not have been human either. Human/vampire hybrids are an established thing in the Twilight universe, and Tiaa clearly isn’t one (just for starters, she’s apparently been aging at a normal rate, as opposed to the highly accelerated pace at which human/vampire hybrids mature), so let’s assume her mom has some other supernatural shit going on. There’s a curse involved, so let’s say she’s a witch or similar.
Why the hell would there be a curse on Tiaa that makes her turn (presumably irreversibly) into a vampire if she has sex with a vampire? Who caused this? What’s going on? Is it specifically Edward who’s dangerous to her, or would any other vampire pose the same threat? What is defined as “sex” here? Vaginal intercourse?
What a weird plot twist. Moving the hell on.
And you will never be safe! Only as a human can you be safe from them…"
Wait, safe from who? Why would being human make her safer? Would she be targeted specifically for being nonhuman if she were to become a vampire? Why?
then he faded and I was awake and uncle larry was standing at my door.
"take ur clothes off now you moldy slut!” said uncle larry and he smiles horribly with his yellow teeth
Geez, Uncle Larry, at least do something about the mold first.
“no i wont” i screamed but uncle larry came over and hit me. I was strong for my size but he was a huge fat man like 300 pounds in weight and stronger than me.
Oh, okay, so we finally get a sense of how big and strong Uncle Larry is compared to Tiaa. Presumably Atlantiana “strong and graceful like the running anti-lopes” Rebekah Loren is faster than this guy, though. I feel like she might still be able to outmaneuver him.
He took my clothes off and chained me to the bed.
Where did the chains come from? Did Uncle Larry bring them with him or do Dave and Marie keep bondage equipment in the house?
I new he was going to rape me again.
That’s an impressive deduction.
But at that moment someone came running into the room and hit uncle larry across the head with a stick and knocks him out cold. Uncle larry laid there bleeding and i looked up at…EDWARD!
I was gonna make a totally different comment here but it actually just struck me (pun not intended) that this is the most in-character Edward has been yet. If you read Twilight, there’s actually a scene where he saves Bella from a group of guys attempting to corner and assault her. His mind-reading ability and stalker tendencies both come in handy here; it’s not a stretch to imagine he might be hanging about in the vicinity of Tiaa’s house, and he would be able to read Uncle Larry’s mind and know what Larry planned on doing to Tiaa. As ridiculous as him conveniently busting in at the nick of time might seem, it’s exactly the sort of thing he’d do.
“omg my sweet lady” he cried! “what has this frightful asshole been doing to thee?”
Never mind, apparently he didn’t actually read Uncle Larry’s mind, or he would have known what the frightful asshole (great phrase) had been doing to Tiaa. So we’re back to the scene making no sense.
“he’s been raping me and hitting me” i weeped sadly as edward unchained me and i put my clothes on. Edward turned away whale I dressed so he wasnt perving on me, and he looked down at the poem I had wroten.
“for truth!these are the most beautiful words I have ever seen, it makes me feel so very moved” he cried “i wish i wasnt promised to someone else then i could write poems for thee"
Edward, man, you’re coming up on 100 years old. You’ve been going through the educational system over and over again for decades. Surely you’ve read some good poetry (by which I mean “surely you’ve read the one or two good poems to have been written in the history of poetry, one of which is definitely ‘The Emperor of Ice Cream’ by Wallace Stevens”) in your time on this earth.
"why are u promised to bella anyways” i ask
“Be cause i made a promise and i cant’ break it, it would be rude and ungentalmanly.
Promised because he made a promise. Got it.
Bella never used to be like she is now,when i fist met her she was sweet and shy and was never nasty about everybody but she has changed and so have her freinds. I dont know watt made her change, maybe it is mine fault, she just seems angry all the time now.”
That’s what happens when a Mary Sue shows up in your story! Canon characters start acting really weird to allow the Sue to fill a specific role that would otherwise not exist!
“Yah that makes sense I guess” i said.
We left the house and went to walk in the woods. We talked about loads of things and it turned out we had a lot in comnon. We liked all the same music and movies and books and stuff, it was like magic.
I actually think one of the perks of dating a vampire would be being able to pick his brain about pop culture through the ages. Like, it’d be really cool to talk about hip youth culture with someone who has been masquerading as a hip young person for over fifty years; that’s gotta be a unique perspective. But what the hell are the odds of a teenager in the 2000s matching interests perfectly with someone who’s lived through the entire 20th century?
“you know maybe bella is unhappy be cause you guys are not in love like u used to be, and u should brake up with her so she can move on and your can both be happy” i say
…see, now that’s actually completely solid relationship advice.
“she all ways used to say that shed kill herself if I left her. I could not be responsable for her death!
Uh, her depression (and/or manipulative tendencies?) isn’t his responsibility. On the other hand, though, this is in-character for Edward.
I just don’t get what has happened to her she used to be nice and sweet like thou my lady.
I feel like Edward isn’t very good at judging when a girl is “nice and sweet.”
And now i am falling in love with thou and it is all such a darn mess!” He hit a tree in frustration and it broke.
This author’s frequent use of purple prose only makes it funnier when she describes something as minimally as this. “It broke.” Brilliant.
He was so strong, i guess cause he was a vampire.
Yeah, could be why.
“your falling in love with me?” i ask, my cheeks going all red and my heart starting to sore
Girl, you okay?
“omg, forget I said that!” he looked relay embarassed and it was so cute. He had a big erection too.
Did this boy just get a hard-on from punching a tree?
I retched out and grabbed his hard throbbing male object.
I am literally imploring you to use the word “penis” instead.
We couldn’t controll ourselves any more and we both fell down on the floor and got naked and made love. It was amazing and lasted hours and I had never been so happy in my life i felt like i coud die with happines.
These two have some impressive stamina considering it’s the first time for both of them. I mean, I guess Edward is a vampire, and Tiaa is… Tiaa, but still.
But after a while edward started to freak out and cry.
Yeah, he’s like that.
“I HAVE BEEN SUCH A FOOL!” he screamed “i should not have let that hapen!
I’ll cut the guy some slack for being eternally seventeen years old, which probably doesn’t come with the best impulse control, but… they had sex for hours, and he only just now started to realize his mistake?
I hope thee can forgive me, i must return to Bella!” and he ran away.
I could not believe it. It was like my world was caving in all about me. i was so socked and angry i could not even cry or scream.
It’s not really shocking, honestly. The entire story has been about Edward’s inability to make up his goddamn mind over whether or not to leave Bella. I’d be angry too, because the constant waffling back and forth is pretty annoying, but… oh, hang on, that actually says she was socked, not shocked. Never mind.
But as i lay there i started to fell diferent, like RELAY diferent. I suddenly remembed watt my father had said to me about not making sex with edward or he woud turn me into a vampire!
Yeah, it’s pretty easy to forget randomly blacking out and having a vision of your vampire dad. That’s the sort of thing that happens so often it’s hard to keep track.
My skin was getting all hard and pale and my eyes could suddenly see a lot clearer than before! I could hear lots of little noises even form relay far away. I even wanted to drink blood!
She’s turning into Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way.
and i could smell a human comin closer, he was almost here
“There you are you horrid SLUG” it was uncle larry “where have u been? I’m goin to rape u now!”
Well, that’s some real authentic-sounding rapist dialogue.
Also, if you remember my comment from earlier about placing bets on which chapter Uncle Larry dies horribly in, and you bet on chapter 6, congrats! You don’t win anything. I’m out of confetti.
Something in me snaped. I jumped at him and broke his neck and drank his blood!
I don’t normally condone vampirism, but in this case — you go, girl! Give ‘em what for!
i had always ben strong for my size but now i was SUPER strong!He looked so surprised and it was so GOOD! Soon i dropped him on the floor and he was…dead!
I woulda thought he’d have died once his neck was broken, but if she has enough technique to keep him alive to suffer even with a broken neck, more power to her.